locagraphix
Loca Graphix- (Jessikah) www.LocaGraphix.com
locagraphix
Basic Info
Gender:
Female
Age:
28 (May 12, 1981)
Location:
New Orleans- Hammond »
Louisiana »
United States
Last Login:
March 8, 2010
Member Since:
November 15, 2008
Membership:
Registered User
Profile Views:
740
Orientation:
Straight
Job:
Smurf
Religion:
Catholic
Drink:
Yes
Dating Status:
Engaged
Body Type:
Average
Smoke:
No
HOBBIES
Graphic designing, Love shooting Photos,animals, music. Hanging on my laptop 24/7.Watching movies and those fake reality shows. Myspace addict. Feel free to add me www.myspace.com/locagraphix (tell me ur from SAF so I don't hit decline)
or

visit my website www.locagraphix.com or my graphic group page www.myspace.com/locagraphixcrew
MOVIES
I love all kind of old movies
House on Haunted Hill, The Gate, Deuce Bigalow Male Gigalow, Forrest Gump, Overboard, Pretty woman, Jackass 2, Finding Nemo,Drumline, White Chicks, Jeepers Creepers, Jaws,Jackass 1 and 2, Boogie Man, Cabin Fever,stomp the yard,bring the noise, you got served, Titanic,Meet the fockers, Shallow Hal, Unbreakable, The haunting, White Noise, Carrie, Halloween, yadda yadda yadda.



Funny how I love Horror movies now as an adult. I was always terrifed of scary movies and would have nightmares as a child. I also love comedies and standup shows. My favorite comedian is Lisa Lampanelli & Lavell Crawford.

I'm always watching movies on tv.


HERE ARE SOME VIDEOS MY MY CHIHUAHUA IN ACTION HEHE.... THIS BOY IS SOMETHIN' ELSE I TELL YA...












MUSIC
Reggaeton, Merengue, Salsa, Bachata, Rap, R&B and more Rap! Artists like Three 6 Mafia, Lil Jon, Ludacris, Webbie,T-pain, Ying Yang Twins,Flo rida, Pitbull,Lil Wayne, Hector n Tito, Ivy Queen,Tony Dize, Wisin and Yandel, Nickelback, Daughtry, etc etc.


...I do not listen to no dayum country....
BOOKS
Beyond shyness by Jonathan Berent. I'm not much of a book reader, If I want to read I go on the internet!
TURN ON'S
[In People] A great sense of humor is always good. Someone who doesn't make comments about me being "shy or quiet". People who actually want to get to know me better. Honestly and Loyalty is very important. I need to be able to trust you for the most part. I never trust anyone 100% maybe 99%.
TURN OFF'S
[In People] If you are stuckup I don't like you already. rude people, pple who judge me right off the bat. People who make comments about me speaking, I put on a smile but my blood boils inside. People who stare at me. Anyone who is mean to animals ticks me off! I don't care to hang around smokers or drug users.
ABOUT ME
Latina Pictures, Images and Photos..



My Name is JESSIKAH
I'm 27 year old Honduran Latina
Born and raised in New Orleans.
I am happily Taken and finally engaged.
I'm a full time Dental Assistant.
I am currently enrolled in The Art Institute Online
getting my AS Degree in Graphic Design.

I finally figured out I have Social Anxiety Disorder over 9 years ago. I have always been extremely shy and have always gotten yelled at by my parents growing up because I was too shy and never talked to other people. I grew up always feeling depressed and unloved because of all the yelling from parents because I wasn't normal. I even tried to commit **** when I was in Jr. High because I was so depressed and sick of being so damn shy about everything! No one knows that part about my life.


I am sick and tired to death of people around me making small jokes about my talking. "Oh she wont say anything, tell Jessikah to go say something, etc" Only a handful of people in my life know that I have Social Anxiety Disorder including my fiance, my best friend, my sister in laws,my boss,my mom and finally my dad.

I have been with my boyfriend/fiance for 8 and a half years and he is wonderful and patient and accepts my SAD but every now and then he may tend to snap and just say "you can't do anything by yourself" or I need to get over it. That gets me upset. I understand that it affects him also but I cant control what I can or CANNOT do.

I recently ordered a Silicone Bracelet that says Social Anxiety Disorder/Social Phobia on it. I wear it all the time and hope it stirs up some interest where I can tell people that that is what I have and what exactly it is. If I am uncomfortable about someone seeing my bracelet and asking me about it I take it off and put it in my pocket so I wont be asked any questions.

I never heard nor hear the words I love you from my mother, therefore It's still hard for me to say it to my fiance, some reason I feel like I sound stupid or something saying it....

I have always and still feel that I'm the unloved/unwanted child of the family. I feel that my mom leans more towards my brother and that my dad leans towards my other brothers and his "new" other daughters. I always felt that his side of the family overlooks me and the same for my mother's side. So I always felt invisible and still do.


I want to overcome this DISORDER and show everyone I am alive,smart,interesting,and normal and worth loving!!!!!



Even though I am very vindictive, I would like to forget the past and how people/family have treated me and just be close with everyone.

Everyday is a challenge for me because I am a Dental Assistant and have to interact people every single day.






I never go grocery shopping alone I always have to go with my fiance. I will not hold the buggy either. The only place you might catch me alone is Walgreens but I get in and out quick. I hate feeling like people are watching me and judging me.

For some reason I'm more uncomfortable around men, I guess I think they are always looking at me. I never use public restrooms due to s.a.d.

I turn to alcohol to help me cope with myself. If I am going to a family get together or birthday party I usually drink myself a daiquiri with a couple extra shots so I can feel comfortable where I'm at.


I remember last Thanksgiving I over did it on the alcohol at my fiance's mom's house and came out of my shell, I remember I was talking and laughing with his cousins and throwing shoes or something in the yard, I dont know what we were doing but I was SOCIAL lol..but regretted it the next day.

This 2008 Thanksgiving I drank before I went to my brothers and mother in laws and lets just say I got so sick I didn't get any thanksgiving and I went home! I drank bc I wanted to "blend in and be cool" around all those people that I didnt know and I screwed up!

I have a very short temper and get angry fast.

I am like Night and Day. I can be in the car with my boyfriend talking my butt off and being goofy and as soon as we pull into his family's driveway and see everyone its like a switch goes off and I'm so quiet and just smile a lot and answer with "one word" answers. At least his entire family accepts my 'shyness' and have never said anything bad about me.

I'm afraid to have kids to be honest, I don't want my kids to inherit my SAD and suffer throughout life like I have and still do. Everyday I'm so depressed and wish I could wake up the next day and be able to say what the hell I want to anyone without being scared,embarrassed or nervous.






Other things that my SA controls are:
Credit card companies calling my cell phone- I'm afraid to answer due to the questions they will ask me.

Calling a credit card company- I have to rehearse in my head over and over what I need to ask. I make sure I write down everything even my name!

Driving with a passenger makes me nervous, I almost feel like I don't know how to drive or act in the car.

Going thru a drive-thru with someone in the car- Damn why do I get so nervous!?

Bringing or picking up trash cans from my long driveway- I guess I dont want the people driving by to look or honk at me.

Calling the not so close people to tell them happy birthday,mothers day etc- I can only do that with my best friend its hard for me to even say it to my mom, brother etc.

Eating in front of others- Wow did I ever get yelled at terribly by my parents about that!!! I would never eat in front of anyone growing up, I never would go out to eat. One time my aunt brung me to a chinese restaurant... Oh boy I was so nervous and inside the restaurant I Threw up!! How embarrassing. I'm still scared to eat in front of others BUT I have greatly improved thanks to my fiance kenneth. I will however, never order anything I have to eat with my hands like sandwiches. If I do eat in public I somehow always have my left hand up on the side of my face, i guess it helps cover me while I am eating so no one will stare... When I go out to eat I make sure my hair is down so it sort of hides my face...

Going to parties/get togethers- I normally try to make up excuses for not being able to go, like I have another party to go to, or I'm sick, or I dont have a car etc etc.


I can go on and on and on. I tend to cry a lot when I'm alone because I just start thinking of all the things that everyone can do and I cant! If it wasnt for SA I would probably be a veterinarian like I have always wanted to be. I would probably be a professional Latin Dancer because I love music and DANCE but nope I cant do what I want out side my comfort zone. There are so many things I would enjoy doing such as: being a photographer, interior designer, vet., zoologist, psychologist. I'm so surprised I'm a dental assistant and going to be a Graphic Designer.


There are times that I just want to go to sleep and never wake up to face another depressing day.
Updates
Videos
Social Anxiety Cartoon
Social Anxiety Cartoon
13 views
Comments
TAMPABAY wrote at January 18, 2010
0 Votes
So...are you heading over to the super bowl? LOL
TAMPABAY
TAMPABAY wrote at September 15, 2009
0 Votes
Hi there how have you been? Not much going on here just checking up on everyone. This place has been dead lately. Football season is even worst. My noles and bucks seem to of lost their way.LOL
TAMPABAY
kattho86 wrote at September 7, 2009
0 Votes
kattho86
kattho86 wrote at September 5, 2009
0 Votes
kattho86
TorLin wrote at August 8, 2009
0 Votes
Hello
I hope you have an enjoyable weekend !
TorLin
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